The holiday season hits like an unexpected event. Some are prepared with savings to pay for the unexpected turn of events. Some are not prepared and fret over the situation and worry how they will cover the uneventful expenses.
Sometimes it seems difficult to be thankful when troubles arise, but with a little effort, there is something you can be thankful for. Where can one find thankfulness when you find out your little girl has cancer? Where can one find thankfulness when you loose your job? Where do you find thankfulness when you spouse leaves you for another person?
So often we can dwell on the things that seem impossible rather than on the things which are possible. We can be depressed or allow depression to set it by what remains what we feel must be done and then forget to be thankful for everything that has been accomplished for us. It feels like our only light becomes extinguished, but if you wait it can be rekindled by a spark from another person. This begins a quest to think with gratitude of those who have come into your life as a light and restarted the flame within you.
Life is short to go through it without being grateful. Make a habit to tell people thank you. Your waiters and waitresses need to hear thank you and please when they wait on you. Leave them good tips to show your gratitude of their good service. Talk to the cashier that is checking you out and make light of the situation to know they are appreciated. When you appreciate those around you and appreciate life, you will find more people and more life.
Begin to educate yourself in gratitude and not take anything for granted. Open your eyes to the countless ways in which you are supported. You will become occupied when you notice what you are giving and thanking those who have supported you than what you receive. I know what you are thinking. I am spent, worn out, put up with family, and cannot find an ounce of what to be thankful for.
I have been in your shoes. It is easy to allow pessimism and judgmental views to cloud the silver lining that is always there. My parents live an hour and half away from me. For a year, they never came up nor did they invite my family to come down because they were too busy selling or building their house. We would call and ask for them to come up or to come down and there were excuses of being sick like headaches, illness, or we have plans prevented us in seeing each other. For the last six year they have not come up to visit and the last two they barely have spoken. I called them recently, when I found out the possiblity that I may have cancer. I have set aside forgiveness and tried to reach out to them again this Thanksgiving. My parents said, “No thank-you.”
Thanksgiving is to be about family. Could I allow my view to get in the way of enjoying a joyful event? I could, but why should I allow my parents, and their judgments against my family, to interfere in me being thankful? Last year it gave me an opportunity to invite my wife’s ex-husband and family into our home for Thanksgiving. I will admit this was tough for me. What did I learn? If Jesus can forgive and have a relationship with those who have sinned, shouldn’t we? The year before that we invited those who were without family into our home to enjoy family. When one door closes no matter how much you yearn for your parents’ love, there is something better that can be done. There is other families and friendships to be had.
I want to challenge you not to be bitter, not to be down, not to fret, and not to worry for God works things out. That is something to be thankful for. Being thankful is stepping out of our selfish zone and looking for the hidden zones that need to be tended too.
Here is how I found in the midst of rejection and storms to be forgiving and Thankful:
Philippians 4:6-7 says, "Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
I had to learn the peace of God comes from having a thankful heart. Note what this peace will do for you. God says "it will keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." People who are not thankful to the Lord are not satisfied. They are discontent always complaining about what they do not have....rather than be grateful for what is God's provision for them.
Psalm 100:2 says, "Serve the Lord with gladness..." and verse 4 tells us to "enter His gates with thanksgiving.
There is much I learned to be thankful for: Salvation, daily provisions of food, clothing, housings, family and friends and prayers. I had to learn and know God’s will. His will guides and provides and that His grace is always sufficient and He will never leave me alone. Being thankful has helped me mentally and physically and there is recent research that shows it is healthy to be grateful.
Jeffrey Froh, Assistant Professor of Psychology at Hofstra University, research focuses on being grateful as a continuing behavior, and the benefits that accrue by staying focused. He advised, "The one particular study that we did was we had students count blessings, which is essentially focusing on the things they were thankful or grateful for, and we had them journal that daily for two weeks.”
Froh’s study followed up three weeks later and found that students who counted blessing were reporting more optimism and satisfaction in their lives than the ones who did not count there blessings. Froh expressed, “"It's beyond feeling good, and beyond happiness, we found that grateful kids tend to report less physical complaints; bit also in the adult literature ... they found that grateful people who counted blessings were more likely to exercise, more likely to report better sleep; less likely to report these physical complaints. There's even some research done, we're looking at, when you have a sense of appreciation your heart rhythms are more coherent and smooth, which of course is healthy."
Therefore, sit, meditate, and reflect on today and the past to remember the good things that God and others have done for you. Take time to write out a note to friends and families and show them your appreciation, even if you feel rejected. At least you can have a peace of mind you tried and the burden is on them. Allow your heart of thanksgiving to become an asset that is a pair of glasses to see a world that is half full rather than empty. It will help you to advance in a world where you can uplift others as you advance through more blessings. ALWAYS celebrate your God-given relationships and even His relationship for Salvation is a big reason to be thankful. Your heart of thankfulness will cause doors to open up for you like they did for me.
People who describe themselves as feeling grateful to others and either to God or to creation in general tend to have higher vitality and more optimism, suffer less stress, and experience fewer episodes of clinical depression than the population as a whole," explained noted author Gregg Easterbrook on beliefnet.com.
As each day comes refreshed; so does my gratitude being renewed daily. The breaking of the sun over the horizon is my grateful heart dawning upon a blessed world. Grace isn't a little prayer you chant before receiving a meal. It's a way to live.
How beautiful a day can be
When kindness touches it!
~George Elliston
